I have a Shakespearean monologue to memorise and perfect for an audition in 5 days and I’m living in an autonomy less hell.
I just want to be alone.
I just want to leave the house.
I don’t think I can take living with my male parental unit any more.
Maybe if I could drive – but then I’d need my own car – and he’d probably still not want me going out.
I can’t get a job to get money for a car without having a car and license to get to a job.
My income is now negative and is surely going to decrease the closer it is to Christmas.
Speaking of which I think my phone credits going to expire soon.
I can’t exactly say “hey dad give me your car keys so I can sit in your car and talk to myself which you may or may not be able to hear anyway”
It’s over 30 degrees today, it’s going to be raining tomorrow and the next day and etc.
I ain’t walking anywhere.
It’s so sunny outside I couldn’t read my page.
I can’t really concentrate in the house.
It’s quiet now so maybe I could instead of ranting but silent reading is only going to get me so far.
I could suck it up, I could ignore how uncomfortable I am, so I can practice my monologue, but I don’t like living like this anyway and it’s always going to be an obstacle somehow!

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