this is not an accurate horoscope, this is a bag of dicks.

I hate that horoscope everyones been posting.
(the picture I’ve seen with it recently doesn’t even have the correct dates!!)
You know, the one that starts by threatening you with a lifetime of bad luck if you don’t share it.
And then throws a bunch of ridiculous, contradictory adjectives and statements into each star sign.
The Libra one has nothing to do with balance or empathy – but hey, apparently I love sport (no)
My cousin (who I could write a dozen posts on but I fear she’d find them) shared it with ‘sooo me’… are you proud? apparently you’re a childish, ill-tempered slut. Oh and all the cliche’d nice qualities too somehow.
How is someone a promiscuous loner who loves long term relationships? How do you treat everyone with kindness and defend your loved ones if you also hold grudges and make people cry?
My cousin does have half of the qualities listed (guess which) …….
I just read most of them again and THEY’RE ALL THE SAME.
One might say ‘great cook’ or whatever but they almost all say ‘one of a kind’, ‘not one to mess with’, ‘loud’…
And Libra is the worst because all of it is recycled words from all the other horoscopes except for ‘likes sports’.
Maybe it’s a comment on the state of humanity, but why are we all described as ‘holding grudges’, ‘make you cry’… even the horoscope for the star sign that said ‘very forgiving’ =\
We’re just disgusting, dumb people aren’t we?

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